I can probably start with any of the three chapters. I guess I will start with Idol Worship.

As a brief background, the following are some quotes from the beginning of the chapter before I quote the passage involving the term ‘vulnerable’. The following are in boldface in the book. “The idol that most people worship every day and every night is an image inside themselves of what they think they are, or what they think they should be.” “The function of idol worship is to avoid living your life directly and fully. Idol worship places a screen between you and your experiences.” “An idol worshiper ignores her inner signals and acts as she thinks she should act.Those inner signals are her emotions.”

Next is the quote of the paragraph where the term ‘vulnerable’ is used. Actually it is on p. 202 itself, which I didn’t indicate in the previous post, as I had not noticed it earlier (and is not referenced in the index).

“Idol worship justifies disregarding what you feel. If an emotion does not fit the role you think you must play – the idol you worship – you attempt to substitute an emotion you think you should feel. If the role you play is Ideal Father, for example, you will not let yourself feel VULNERABLE. Your love for your family will express itself in what you provide for them. Emotions that do not fit your image of what an Ideal Father, or provider, should feel will be pushed aside. Playing the role of Ideal Father is how you push them aside.”

The question arises: What does the term ‘vulnerable’ mean in the above statement?

I will share my thoughts in the next post. Comments from the spiritual partners are heartily welcome.

With love and trust,
Sundar

Next, Gary describes how he was a worshiper of a Daredevil idol (pp. 205-207, The Heart of the Soul). His reference is to his enlisting in the U. S. Army, his becoming a paratrooper, an officer, and then an officer in the Green Berets.

He says: “That made me, in my opinion, the elite of the elite. I was not looking beyond my opinion of myself. I did not have the courage to do that. I felt that my exciting life made me the envy of men, admirable to women, and valued by all.”

Then comes the reference to vulnerable and vulnerability. He says: “I was reaching for love in a convoluted way. I set up barriers against rejection by proving to myself in advance, and I thought to others, that I was worthy of acceptance whether they rejected or accepted me. I did not have the ability to feel my VULNERABILITY. In fact, my VULNERABILITY was driving me to do everything, including enlisting in the army. I desperately needed to demonstrate that I was not VULNERABLE. I attempted to become inhumanly perfect. In the process, I eliminated any possibility of genuine relations.”

Here also, as in the one I indicated in my previous post, Gary seems to say that one should have the ability to feel one’s vulnerability and that he didn’t have that ability.

Gary follows the above with the statement: “Being frightened is a part of the human experience. It lies beneath every impulse to grow spiritually – to find the roots of fear and pull them.” He continues: “I was too frightened of being frightened to admit my fear.”

The first of the above two statements seems to conform with what I indicated in my previous post as his implication of the term vulnerable. I need to know that I am vulnerable, meaning that the fp’s my soul brought with me in this lifetime will be active and will attempt to overpower my lp’s. (Gary says on p. 205 that he also liked the image of his motivation for joining the military being love of country. I think it is a role played by an lp.) My feeling vulnerable is recognizing the expectation in the Earth school that I should discover my fp’s, challenge them and replace them with the lp’s my soul brought with me, which I should discover and nourish, both constituting my spiritual growth.

Gary goes on to say: “This is the life a Daredevil inhabits. He fears his emotions and strives to create an emotionless world of continual admiration for himself. He becomes an idol to himself as well as others. He cannot allow into his awareness emotions such as fear of rejection, lack of worthiness, or VULNERABILITY that do not fit his picture of himself. He strives for ever more difficult or dangerous accomplishments in order to continually prove himself worthy of love.”

He seems to me to imply by vulnerability the state of my being aware of the Grand Design of the Universe regarding the Earth school according to which (i) my soul has brought with me certain fp’s in this lifetime, (ii) I should realize therefore that I am vulnerable and be willing to feel the fp’s, (iii) on the other hand, these fp’s are tricky and cunning and would tempt me into some or other idol worship to divert my attention from my feeling them, (iv) although the fp’s make me feel so frightened and induce in me the fear of rejection and lack of self-worth, I am really not susceptible to any attack or injury, that is, I am really not vulnerable as my five-sensory perception dictates, which I think Linda implied at the beginning of the live call, (v) my life experiences are opportunities meant by the Universe to help me discover these fp’s and challenge them and change them with the lp’s that my soul has also brought with me in this lifetime, and (vi) I am not susceptible to attack or injury, that is, I am not vulnerable in the five-sensory meaning of the term, as long as I allow only my lp’s to be active in my life in the Earth school.

Do I make sense? Do I correctly interpret Gary and Linda’s use of the term vulnerable, vulnerability? Am I missing something?

Doug and other spiritual partners, I deeply appreciate comments and thoughts.

With love and respect,
Sundar

Dear Patrice, Luz, Tim, Doug (and David, Kristen),

I completely respect all your opinions. I humbly beg to differ. Please allow me to explain why.

Gary and Linda point out in the chapter on Personality in the Mind of the Soul the following:
my personality = body + emotions + 5-sensory perceptions + intellect + multisensory perceptions + intuitional structure

In other words, it is probably wrong to focus all the attention on emotions only, although emotions are no doubt very very important. The others listed above are also important. One conclusion I have come to from the above is that it might actually be wrong to raise the question as to whether ‘intellect’ is an fp. Fp has to do with emotion, and intellect is not an emotion. The two play entirely different roles, but equally important roles in the Earth school, I think.

The story of Gary’s is simply mind-boggling to me. Originally when he graduated from Harvard, he was not into science or math. Listening to the discussions on ‘the nature of reality’ during a lecture at Berkeley made him get interested in quantum theory and theory of relativity. To understand these in depth one has to first know calculus. I can easily imagine the kind of efforts he must have taken to go deep into both theories at an intellectual level. The intellect involved there cannot be ignored at all in my humble opinion.

And, the connections he made between what science conveys about the nature of reality and what this spiritual life in the Earth school might all be about, as revealed originally in the Dancing Wu Li Masters and then in the Seat of the Soul must have required a lot of intellectual exercise on his part, along with his attention to emotions and along with the intuitions that he was open to.

I don’t remember in which book and where, but I really think Gary points out that a proper balance between heart and head is crucial. If I am correct, I take it to mean that focusing on head alone is not at all enough and focusing on heart alone is not enough either. A proper mix of the two is essential for spiritual growth. Isn’t it true that after we pay attention to the physical sensations, we have to correctly analyze and understand the connections between our actions and/or words and the fp’s or lp’s that our physical sensations point to?

I honestly believe that Gary’s video on serenity prayer released recently is in answer to the question I sent online. (I am not 100 % sure because I don’t think I asked whether he knew the serenity prayer. But, other than that, the words he read were basically mine. So, I am assuming nobody else sent exactly the same question although it is possible.) If so, that gives me the confidence that he does answer the questions sent online (those who read this thread might recall that I did ask for helpful suggestion in this regard). Since my question regarding vulnerability is so critical to me in my understanding of his teachings and my applying them further and further in my life, I do plan on asking him the question. After I clicked the Submit button for my latest post in this thread, it occurred to me that the first meaning of vulnerability I was referring to could be the meaning from the multisensory point of view, while the second meaning is the one from the five-sensory point of view. I would like to know whether this is correct or not. And, I believe it is safe for everyone if I stop discussing my questions in this community forum.

Doug, yes, I would indeed love to be a participant of Gary and Linda’s programs except for two factors. One is that during the regular academic semester I cannot leave town as I never ever like to skip any of the classes I teach. So, if the program requires attendance in March, etc., I cannot make it. The second is that to me these programs are pretty expensive. It is hard for me to afford. Yet, I do want to participate at some point of time, since I really love to see and long for seeing this amazing man and interact personally with him. I hope I do get an opportunity one day.

With love and respect,
Sundar

Dear Doug,

Thank you so much for sharing the information. I really appreciate it. I can easily imagine the richness of the experiences for everyone, which I have longed for also. Hoping to see you at a program at some point in the future.

With love and trust,
Sundar

In the chapter on Intimacy in the Heart of the Soul, Gary says:
“Intimacy is the measure of the energy that leaves your energy system in love and trust.”
“The experience of intimacy is not related to how others act or do not act, or how they speak or do not speak. It depends on how energy leaves your energy system.”
“When energy leaves your processing system in love and trust, the result is the experience of intimacy.”

Gary then says on pp. 113 and 114 the following that is related to this specific thread that aims to understand the concept of vulnerability:
“Intimacy requires VULNERABILITY. Being VULNERABLE does not require that you share every feeling of insecurity you have with another person or with anyone. It requires that you feel your every experience of insecurity. If you cannot feel your own insecurities, you will not be able to see them in others, much less appreciate them in others.”

Intimacy requires vulnerability! Wow!!

How to analyze and understand this statement?

With love and trust,
Sundar

Dear Doug,

Thank you so much for sharing.

“I mistakenly thought that if I only knew the “why” to my questions I would be transformed. My new knowledge would somehow set me free because I knew why I was doing what I did not want to do.”
I completely agree with you that such a thought would indeed be a mistake. The new knowledge is not the end of the process, it is just the beginning of the process, but an inevitable, critical beginning of the process, meaning that without such a beginning there is no question of proceeding further with the process effectively and efficiently, and then reaching the end. In fact, without such a beginning, the process could even be going in the opposite direction, namely the situation getting worse and worse, which is obviously not desirable.

“But I am coming to realize that the new knowledge is simply a collection of tools, keys, maps, and techniques that I must use on my journey in the Earth School.”
Yes, indeed. It is a collection of tools, keys, maps and techniques, no doubt. But, without those, the journey in the Earth school might only be painful all the time. That is how important properly analyzing and understanding all those tools, etc. happen to be, to start with.

“Until I read The Seat of the Soul I never knew it was important to my spiritual growth.”
Exactly. That says it all. Actually, it is not just reading it that is important, but analyzing and understanding its contents properly, as you yourself point out in your next sentence:
“Through my analysis I have significantly more understanding of why emotional awareness is valuable, how to use it, and how to improve my use of it.”

“like all skills, until I put it into practice it does not improve. So I have been practicing, all be it awkwardly.”
You said it very well. I totally agree with the significance of practicing it. In fact, that is what the above beginning should lead to.

Thus, in my humble opinion, the relevant point here is that such a practice with the heart is not possible before the head plays its significant role of analyzing and understanding the why and how of things. During this inevitable and critical process of analyzing and understanding, a number of different questions ought to arise. And, when we raise such questions, if we assume that it is the result of fp’s, we are not going to be able to proceed. Thus it can be very misleading. This is the point I have been trying to make in this thread. So, you and I are not saying different things; we are saying the same thing.

“Perhaps you and I can share our experiences with emotional awareness together so we can support each other through this particular class in the Earth School.”
Thank you so much for stating this. My thought has been to illustrate my analysis and understanding of Gary’s statement, “intimacy requires vulnerability”, using my own life experience as an example. I will do it in my next post. Looking forward to your comments, as well as comments from other spiritual partners of course.

With love and trust,
Sundar

I wrote in the previous post: “(I would prefer not to respond to any post that suggests that I must have had fp’s active as I wrote this.)”

I should add the following:
I would prefer not to respond to any post that suggests that I must have had fp’s active as I wrote this, without clearly explaining what statements of mine point to such a possibility and, if possible, how so.

I think that this is very important. After seeing the potential of Gary’s teachings in my own life, I often try to help others see it also. In the process I have come to understand that being a spiritual partner is not an easy thing at all. It is not just a question of my telling the other person that he or she appears to have an fp active. I think it is important to be as clear as possible to point out why and how I think so. This gives the other person an opportunity to analyze further whether I could be correct in my supposition or not, because there is no guarantee that I have to be correct.

The real danger is when my supposition actually happens to be wrong. I just tell the other person to check whether an fp is active without further explaining why and how I suppose so. The other person assumes that I am correct whereas I am actually wrong in my supposition. This can only lead to a lot of confusion on his or her part. Dangerous, I think.

With love and trust,
Sundar