Intention
Topic: Support in shifting my intention - Stephanie Started 11 years, 5 months ago
Posted 11 years ago
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Hello Everyone, |
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Posted 11 years ago
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Stephanie, this is a wonderful realization and remember to also look at your courage as a “Loving Part.” I don’t want to get into “advice mode” but to help you keep challenging your FP’s. Where do you feel the FP’s in your body? What are the obsessive thoughts? Can you invite your husband to talk beyond texting to provide opportunities to be spiritual partners and challenge the FP to “always be right.” Can you practice challenging this FP with everyone you come into contact with daily even if you can’t with your husband? Are you attached to any outcomes because of the fear of losing him or can you commit yourself to challenge your FP’s regardless of the outcome. Remember to ask the universe for intuition about which “loving parts” can challenge your FP’s. Much Love, |
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Posted 11 years ago
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Thank you Berta. I don’t think I can talk to him, he is very much wanting a divorce and doesn’t want to be with me. He is in love with someone else. But I’ve been in contemplation all day, and found at the end of the day, the only answer is to be vulnerable and true and give with my whole heart with no hope of return on investment. I have been so afraid to let go. I now see that is the only thing I can do. Love him by letting go. And intending loving thoughts and feel the total grief of asking for love from someone who is not able to give it(just to prove my unlovableness). I did some great writing today. I found that I am only hurt and resentful by his comments because I owned them as true about me. I re-wrote the responses I would have given had I been present/conscious/coming from my loving parts and it was very freeing. I didn’t have to defend or take them on. Only listen, hear, and be curious to learn more. I am grateful. He is my teacher. Yes, husband, you are right! I have a lot of work to do on myself. I intend to work on myself for the rest of my life!! And, I am SO proud of how far I’ve come:) |
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Posted 11 years ago
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I want to also add that another FP that comes up is the need to please him. I have been playing out another story as long as I’ve been with him, and that is, if I change, if I get better, then he will get better and we will get better. I have been dedicated to my spiritual growth throughout our marriage, and have never gotten validation/acknowledgment for that, only criticism. I guess my thought on this is that I can only change for me and be satisfied with my own growth, not look to the outside for validation. |
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Posted 11 years ago
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Stephanie, it is wonderful how committed you are to challenging your FP’s. You mentioned you are proud of the work you’ve done so far (that is a loving part) – make sure to recognize your loving parts to help you challenge and cope with the FP’s. I agree that your husband has been your teacher even though your interactions with him have been painful. Do you think that him not validating all of your spiritual growth can give you a opportunity to validate yourself instead of waiting for someone else’s validation. What triggers the feelings of being unlovable? What loving part can challenge that FP? Also, what FP is triggering the “wanting to please?” What emotions and sensations are you feeling in your body as you continue to challenge your FP’s? Courageous work Stephanie! Much Love, |
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