At the beginning of this year I experienced such strong fps that for several days I couldn’t step out of them to see the situation clearly and from a loving part of my personality. The fps were blaming one person, caretaking yet another person whom they perceived as a victim of the first person’s behavior, and finally they were blaming myself for not having said or done anything when I had witnessed the situation they had perceived as abusive. Then came the cat episode I recounted nine days ago. The cat has since returned home, well and happy. What was important for me to learn in these related episodes was to see how I had allowed fps to dictate my interpretation of a situation, including myself and others. Our cat companion specifically taught me that I needed to set my intention to take responsibility for my reactions.

Taking responsibility for my reactions means that I stop looking outside myself at the trigger and blaming this trigger for my fp reactions, that I use each triggering situation as an opportunity to look inside myself, to learn about myself, to become a more aware, conscious being who has the power to see a situation with clarity and love. Already many opportunities for spiritual growth have come to me from setting that intention.

I will give one example from today, just at the time of our call with Gary and Linda. When the call began I was leaving a meeting away from home and so first listened to the call while driving back. In the car I suddenly remembered that two days ago I had purchased a loaf of bread at a coop and hadn’t seen it since then. When I realized that I was allowing that thought to distract me I challenged it in order to remain focused on what Gary and Linda were saying. Still, the fps of distraction made a point of remembering that I should look for the bread once I got home—did I leave it in the trunk of the car or did I put it somewhere in the kitchen? Upon returning home I indulged those fps and quickly looked for the bread. When I didn’t find it, I went into another fp reaction, wanting to blame the people who had sold me the bread, as though they were responsible for my leaving it at the store! These fps also began to miss the bread and to crave for it for the first time since I had purchased it. For two whole days I hadn’t even given a thought to this loaf of bread, and here I was, suddenly feeling pain in my chest and my throat as though this bread were of the utmost importance for my life! Above all, I was indulging fps that kept me distant from Gary and Linda for a few minutes—keeping me distant from what I could learn in the call.

Once I realized that I was in a reaction, I challenged those fps and was able to see that I needed to take responsibility for my sensations and emotions. I stopped blaming the trigger and just saw it as a situation, without any fp attachment—not even blaming myself for having forgotten to take the bread—and I was able to bring back my full attention to the call. I also laughed a little at the absurdity of this fp reaction.

Having set my intention to take responsibility for my reactions provided me with this opportunity for spiritual growth. Without that intention, I might have indulged the fps for more than a few minutes and I would have missed an opportunity to learn from the call as well as an opportunity to learn from interacting with spiritual partners or to support spiritual partners.

I have countless such examples, none of which are trivial no matter how small they may seem, since they awaken fps whose reactions signal the existence of a strong root fp of powerlessness that wants to be in control of external circumstances in order to feel safe, so it sees safety and comfort in a loaf of bread or any other object that it would attempt to control. Setting my intention has brought more triggering situations to my awareness. Even though I may at first react with pain, I welcome them as means of supporting me in creating authentic power. Setting my intention also means greater awareness so that when a triggering situation comes my way I don’t indulge an fp reaction to the point of believing it is true.

With love,
Catherine