I too have lived with the experience of not being liked for as long as I could remember. I mostly covered it up with pleasing and care taking (not being in my integrity) which created the feeling of being used and further supported my fp belief of not being liked. I wise person recently shared with me the following; you will experience being liked, to the extent you like yourself, all the parts of yourself. This felt so clear to me in a deep way in that it put the focus back in learning and accepting myself as a challenge to my fps that look to others as a mirror of how I feel about myself.

Thanks for sharing Eric,
Respectfully , Soula.

Eric, what I know for sure is that every painful reaction I have is an avenue leading me to a priceless gift. I have found one of the ways to unwrap my gift has been to ask what is the intention of my fp?

For example, when I met my son’s future parents-in-law last spring, a very familiar inferiority fp was triggered. I was so physically and emotionally debilitated that I spent a good part of three days in bed. Before learning how to create Authentic Power, I would have spent that time digging myself into a deeper hole, experiencing shame, embarrassment, dread of the wedding itself and of the entire future because it will “have to” include these people, etc, etc. All of these fp thoughts came up in me through those three days, however my intention was to feel them in order to heal them. And when I asked myself, “What is the intention (the effect) of this inferiority fp?” I could see that its intention was to stop me from being open with these people and sharing my gifts with them and to stop me from experiencing the pleasure of loving them. The four-day wedding gathering took place on (Canadian) Thanksgiving weekend last month. I was joyfully present and felt a deep connection not just to that couple but to everyone else there as well. Throughout those days, any time the fp reared its head, I chose instead to continue that beautiful flowing experience. It felt natural and easy and real and authentically me.

If you wish to share about it, what do you think is the intention of the fp that is triggered in you in the situations you describe?

With love, Rosalind

Thank you for your question, Joanne. My intention (I thought at the time) was to offer Eric support that I have found helpful, without requiring him to share his answer. Your question helps me see that I have a fp that does not want to be perceived as ‘pushing’ someone. My chest hurts when I think of that happening, and my thoughts are that I resent being pushed, I don’t want anyone to resent me, and I’m attached to them being open to hearing me. So good to see all that. Thank you for your support, Joanne.

With love, Rosalind

Hi Everyone, Your sharing ‘not being liked’ resonates with my frightened part that feels others judge me. As I look deeper, I have discovered is that this frightened part is actually what is judging me. The self-talk is always demeaning and when I believe its thoughts, those thoughts keep me separate from others and judges others for not liking me. I am then riding on a wheel to no-where. When I challenge those frightened parts by bring myself back to the present moment, I am able to feel the pain they create in my body and in my life. Thank you for opening the door which allowed me to explore this frightened part that has created a lot of distance in my life. I know this is a familiar frightened part in me and my intention is to remember this sharing when I hear it in the future so I can challenge and heal it.

Love, Carol Ann