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Topic: Hello - Started 12 years, 7 months ago

Viewing 7 posts - 1 through 7 (of 7 total)
Anonymous
Posted 13 years ago

hmm, I am being drawn to the Seat of the Soul as of 2000. When I read the book I understood little at the time till I arrived at the chapter on addiction. At that point I experienced a connection with Gary as in my heart I knew that Gary too had struggled with sexual addiction. He was describing my exact struggles and I knew for me that no one could describe it in that way without having experienced it. I had used similar language in how I experienced my sexual addiction to therapists and was often dismissed by claiming that my impulse was ‘normal human biology.’ but I could not rest in my heart because of the ‘exploitative’ type nature of my impulse.

12 years later and the struggle still lives in me. Not as it once did. This struggle is why I was born (from a healing point of my life). It is seven years that I have not been involved in an intimate relationship. I just feel that intimacy is impossible if I still have some of that exploitative parts living in me. Yet, the loneliness is at times brutal. So, I often remain confused on how to proceed.

anyhow, that is a little about me.

with much love,
Christina
Posted 13 years ago

Thanks for sharing, Eric. Those exploitative parts are parts of the frightened part of your personality
and like Gary, he owned those feelings and now makes choices from Love. I’m reading THE HEART OF THE
SOUL along with the course, and it is so powerful and helpful (and is rather easy to understand). His
book on SPIRITUAL PARTNERSHIPS is fabulous, too. So much to learn and put into practice. That’s the
challenging part!
LORI SHARP
Posted 13 years ago

Hi Eric,
When I read the chapter on addiction, I felt Gary was writing it for me. I had never before understood that my fear was driving my actions. Once I became aware of my energy centers, I could see how I had been using others to feel better and it opened me to experience a whole new world. I can feel when I or anyone around me has the energy of sexual addiction active and I use those opportunity to learn more about myself. Now, when this energy is active within me, I know that I have a frightened part active and can look deeper into my experiences in the moment and not react to my feelings but learn more about why these feelings are there and what is underneath them. I am so excited to begin to have these conversations with you and others on this board.

Anonymous
Posted 13 years ago

yes, for me the process has not been the difficult part but rather the practice of it. i have grown so much in awareness (Light) that is has become much, much more difficult to engage in any sexual addictive behavior. The behaviors are much more rare but I still feel the energy of exploitation within me. And I can feel the fear very vividly. I have isolated for a large part of my adult life and feel that the exploitative energy that continues to live within is a message that the isolation can not continue. That I must move through the isolation or else I will also stay in the dark (Fear) and chose to exploit whether in behavior or in thought. It is all so very beautiful because I know that my soul was born to do this work. My family has struggled with sexuality issues and I have an opportunity to create differently for the future. At times it’d be nice if the ‘practice’ of it weren’t as hard as it is but i have no doubt that in future I will relish this process. with much love, Eric

Margie
Posted 12 years ago

Hello Eric,

Day five… Thank you for being here. Amazingly, your courage compels me to have the same. I too practice abstinence and have for a long time. Only, still the pain remains. You see, I married my best friend at 32 yrs. old and continue to have a non-sexual marriage. Now, I’m not suggesting for you the same advice. I’m just here practicing my integrity. Dare I write, bravery. These Spiritual Partnership Guidelines, help.

Abandonment and abuse controlled my frightened parts. You see, sexually I would reel’em in and spit’em out. Emotionally, I was unworthy to be loved and to love. So, will see what happens next. If I keep my eyes on the doughnut and not upon the hole, who knows. Anyways, intuition brought me here and gosh dare it, authentic power will bring me out into this world where I can really be at one with myself and others.

Thanks,

Margie

Anonymous
Posted 12 years ago

Hi Margie,

Thx for sharing. It’s been and is a very tough process for me. I am not necessarily practicing abstinence but trying to be as honest and clear about my intentions before engaging intimately with anyone. If I feel fear or the energy of exploitation rush up in me I know that in that precise moment I have a very significant choice to make; love vs fear. But the most significant learning of all for me is that I can only create authentic power in the moment of my experience. I can read, pray, meditate, travel, etc. but any deep change takes place when I choose love in the moment I realize that I am in fear. And that is the real ‘kicker’ because what do I choose when the ‘rubber hits the road’? And this is the tough part of the entire experience because as much support as I have access to (physical & non-physical) the work to be done is mine.

There are many moments when I wish there were an easier way.

Lots of love,
Eric
Margie
Posted 12 years ago

Thanks for your reply, Eric.

Actually, it’s been one week so far, I have been in this community. Still, chapter one throws me a little. Only, I have been on this journey for many years. Little by little, I have grown spiritually but sometimes I wonder if sexual cravings will ever just go away since I do not intend to engage intimately with anyone, anytime soon.

Anyways, it’s late. Thanks again and good night,

Margie

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