I am struggling to deal with something and looking for support / feedback.

My eldest brother has been dealing with various undiagnosed mental illness for over 15 years. His behaviors are very much like a drug addict but he is not. He does have an addiction to food. In the past decade he has had 2 suicide attempts. Both were more suicide ideation but still attempts. My parents and I have always been concerned and have done our best to offer love regardless of his behaviors. They (my parents) are also the owners of a small family business and for the past 6 years they have had him on their payroll. For the past 4 years he has been 100% supported by my parents; they own his house, pay his mortgage, pay his car, provide him with a credit card & pay all his bills. My brother gets psychological treatment but nothing changes because he does not tell them the full truth about how he is able to live. He has two children (10 & 14) which he has every other week. However, he is often inattentive…he will not make them dinner unless they ask, they need to wake themselves up to go to school as he wakes up late. All the while he will buy his children elaborate gifts (i.e. iPad). To add to this my dad is in financial distress and concerned about going bankrupt.

Over the past 4 years I have tried numerous times to lovingly suggest to my parents that the financial enabling is hurting my brother but it will never stop. They will continue because they are terrified that without the financial support that he will commit suicide. My brother will most likely not change and he is often abusive at the worse but mainly exploitative.

And I sit with so much pain in my stomach, chest, neck. I feel so powerless. I see where this will unfold; my parents bankrupt, my brother I don’t know where. And yet there is nothing I can do. I can’t seem to find peace. To accept that the situation I am experiencing is as it should be and to love my brother fully. But it is so hard because he so often lies, says very hurtful things, yells, tries to exploit.

For example this weekend he and his kids are staying with me. But he will not do a thing. I will cook, clean, take the kids to the pool. I try my best to do it from as much love as possible and other times I ask myself if I am just being taken advantage of.

any thoughts on how I can handle this with more peace and serenity?