Aloha Daniella,

So beautiful to welcome you to the life school. My name is Luz and I also feel your excitement about being part of learning and growing in the evolution of this lifetime! 🙂 Might I suggest another wonderful book written by Gary Zukav and Linda Francis called “The Heart of the Soul, Emotional Awareness”. It is another book that has brought new awareness and understanding in my life. In addition to that knowledge, it also helps introduce some of the vocabulary used in the video’s appearing Gary and Linda.

If you are open to doing so, I invite you to share with us how you are experiencing the intensions you set and how that is appearing in your life.

Feel free to explore throughout the Life School website and share your thoughts in the community form.

With much love,
Luz

Daniella,

To add to the important point that Doug has made above, the topic for last month live call was proactive loving. The audio for this can be seen under Latest Live Teaching on the right of the home page. The same is going to be the topic for next month live call also (on the 24th).

Doug and others,

I need help regarding the above topic. I am unable to recognize the difference between this topic and any previous discussions on just loving (rather than proactive loving). What are the important differences?

Thank you in advance.

With love and trust,
Sundar Naga

Hello Shelley,

Thank you so much for seconding it. I like to elaborate on my question.

By their very design, the frightened parts automatically become active at any given moment unless I take special efforts to challenge them and force the loving parts to become active instead. So, by their very design, the loving parts have to be initiated consciously by me at every moment. I cannot sit back, be unconscious and hope that the loving parts would become active on their own. When I sit back and be unconscious, fear always takes over and my path is always horizontal; I continue to get angry. For love to take over fear and for me to travel on a vertical path I have to take the initiative, be dynamic, not static, and bring about the changes internally within myself with awareness, with consciousness. That is, I always have to be proactive.

So, does the adjective proactive just add emphasis to this inherent nature of loving, implying that there is no other go than to be proactive about loving? In other words, does loving always imply proactive loving? This is what it seems to me to be the case.

Or, are there fundamental differences between loving and proactive loving that I happen to be missing? That is, as you are also wondering, are they both different aspects of courageous human relationships? If so, what are those fundamental differences?

Expecting comments from you and other spiritual partners on the community board. Thank you all in advance, as I am deeply interested in understanding this.

With love and respect,
Sundar

Hi Doug,

Thank you for your honest sharing. I totally empathize, as I have seen the same tendency in myself, to share, to help someone because a frightened part of my personality wants to get that boost. I, Ms. wonderful, know it all and am helping little you, so to speak. A temporary sop to the frightened parts, at best.

But still, it is a conundrum.

We could all be helping one another better understand how to apply these wonderful teachings to our day to day situations. We could all be making good progress. In AA, CODA, NA and such anonymous programs, one of the foundations is that as you get better, you teach others, that strengthens your own base, your own understanding and practice.

Also, part of being authentic must mean being able to coach and guide others. So, how do you do that without acting out your frightened parts? Perhaps the answer is meditating on it until you know your motivation is pure? Perhaps it is sharing not just your successes, but also, how you had a similar situation (admitting you are not Ms/Mr. Superior), but this is the advice we got, or this is how we worked it out.

Someone more steeped in the program than I can perhaps step in and clarify.

Or maybe you have had additional insights on this since you last wrote, would love to know the progression of your journey.

And, I hope you know that we really appreciate your guidance Doug, and I at least have not smelled the stink of superiority, but rather always seen thoughtfulness and a genuine desire to help in your responses.

Love and gratitude for all,
Shelley

• This reply was modified 7 years, 5 months ago by Shelley P. Reason: Additional thoughts

Shelley,

You have made good points. To add to them, let us imagine for a second that Gary had taken the same stand as suggested by Doug – let us imagine that he refrained from sharing his ideas in his wonderful books after assuming that his frightened parts were probably making him feel superior to everybody else. What would be the consequence? Unimaginable as far as I am concerned! Because of the impact of his books on me in my life.

I honestly believe that your statement “But still, it is a conundrum” says it all! I have always thought that every good message can have one of two possible effects on any one – a positive impact or a negative impact. One might wonder how a good message can ever have a negative impact. After learning from Gary’s amazing teachings the answer seems to be clear – it is just the role of the frightened parts; they make sure that the good message is misinterpreted as much as possible by the personality and the personality applies it in the wrong direction.

Shelley, I like to share here an honest feeling of mine in a courageous manner – there is something fundamentally wrong with this community board. Under normal circumstances I would expect my questions to generate a wealth of good discussions and heart-to-heart communications among the members. I honestly believe that my questions about loving vs proactive loving are extremely important. It is one thing if no member has any response at the moment for the questions asked; I can understand the corresponding silence. But, when I read the response which pointed to me that there is a provision on the home page for asking questions to Gary, I had to tell myself ‘here we go again’. But, I had decided not to respond to it at all. However, after I saw your response, I decided to share my honest feeling. I could be totally wrong in my feeling, in which case I will stand completely corrected; in fact, I hope I am wrong. During almost every live call Gary and Linda encourage everyone to use this forum; I am hoping I have not misunderstood their directive in any way.

With love and trust,
Sundar